


I'd give you my sunshine

by donttouchtheneednoggle



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Fluff, Multi, Polyamory, Post-Episode: s01e05 Lancelot, Secret Relationship, but there is no way in hell tom is dying ok, cos the one thing they all need is more secrets, idk where we'd be in canon at this point, lance stays in camelot, they're doing great at that, this is a tom lives au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-04
Updated: 2021-02-04
Packaged: 2021-03-16 05:55:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29202435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/donttouchtheneednoggle/pseuds/donttouchtheneednoggle
Summary: "Are yousureyou're not jealous?"
Relationships: Gwen & Morgana (Merlin), Gwen/Lancelot (Merlin), Gwen/Lancelot/Merlin (Merlin), Gwen/Merlin (Merlin), Lancelot & Leon (Merlin), Lancelot/Merlin (Merlin), Merlin & Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Comments: 16
Kudos: 64
Collections: Merlin Bingo





	I'd give you my sunshine

**Author's Note:**

> For Merlin Bingo prompt 'jealousy'

“Are you _sure_ you’re not jealous?” Leon asked gently.

Two months ago, if you’d told Lancelot that the First Knight of Camelot would not only be the most tolerant of him of all the knights, but actually befriend him, he would’ve laughed. Politely, of course. That was, until he’d learnt that Leon had grown up with Gwen.

He sighed and mumbled something indistinct.

Leon had seen Gwen go through all manner of crushes throughout their teenage years (or rather had them pointed out to him by a giggling Elyan) and was familiar enough with the signs to know his friend had it bad for Merlin. Like really bad.

But sometimes he wondered, as he had this morning when they'd passed them in a corridor, laughing and sneaking looks at each other, if it wasn’t more than a fleeting infatuation.

Leon had also seen how Lancelot had gazed lovingly after them, and was unsure as to whom he pined for.

Now he put a hand sympathetically on his arm. “They seem to be rather smitten with each other, indeed I have not seen Gwen so happy in a long time. Even if they were not... you know it would not be appropriate for a knight to consort with a commoner."

Lancelot smiled, a small secret thing, and turned mischievous eyes to Leon. "Ah, but I _am_ a commoner."

Leon gripped his shoulder and shook it, glaring. "None of that nonsense. You are a knight whatever anyone says. You are as much a knight as any one of the others if not more, and if Prince Arthur says it then it should be good enough for them."

Lancelot pressed his lips together to hide another smile. “And King Uther right?"

"Right," Leon muttered. "Of course."

Lancelot grinned and patted his hand. “I appreciate your concern, but really I am fine. I only wish them whatever makes them happy.”

Leon beamed fondly at him as they left the armoury. “And I am with you there, my friend.”

…………………

“Are you _sure_ you’re not jealous?”

Gwen, gazing out the window with an affectionate smile on her face, jumped. The knights were just finishing practice, and Merlin was there to attend to Arthur as usual. As she watched, Merlin said something to Lancelot, making him laugh loudly, apparently oblivious to the surrounding knights’ frowns.

“They do seem to be very close,” Morgana continued, coming up behind her.

Gwen sighed, wishing for the thousandth time that Morgana hadn’t accidentally caught her and Lancelot exchanging a chaste kiss in a deserted corridor. But that was just how the Pendragons were – spectacularly gifted at being in the wrong place at the wrong time. At least her friend had promised to keep it a secret.

Gwen shrugged and smiled. "Lancelot was alone for a long time. I’m glad he’s got such a good friend.”

Morgana nodded slowly, and laid a hand concernedly on her arm.

“As long as _you’re_ happy.“

Gwen had to press her lips together to keep from chuckling. “I promise you I am very very happy.”

…………………

“Are you _sure_ you’re not jealous?” Arthur demanded as Merlin helped him off with his armour.

The prince had found out part of the truth in the early days before Lancelot had got his own chambers. He’d got impatient waiting for Merlin to come to work and barged into his room only to find them sitting on his bed kissing.

They’d somehow managed to convince him that the whole commoner knight thing was maybe not the end of the world and asked him to keep it a secret. And Arthur, being a vaguely decent human being however he acted most of the time, had agreed.

"Do you not see how he looks at her?"

Merlin frowned, feigning confusion. "Who?"

Arthur rolled his eyes dramatically. “Gwen, you idiot! Are you _sure_ Lancelot- er- likes men?"

"Oh believe me, I'm sure." He winked just to make Arthur flush. “Besides, are you doubting the honour of your knight?”

Arthur looked genuinely contrite at that. “Of course not,” he assured him earnestly.

Merlin grinned and picked up a basket of laundry before heading out. At the door he paused-

"You know you can like both right?"

Arthur blinked. “You- you can?"

Merlin laughed. "See you later, cabbagehead." He expertly dodged the boot that came flying at his head and ducked out the door, whistling loudly.

…………………

At midday Gwen left the castle and made her way into the woods. Merlin was already waiting in the clearing off the main path when she reached it.

His face split into his goofy, infectious grin as soon as he saw her, and he hugged her delightedly like they haven’t seen each other for days, not hours.

“Good morning?” he asked as they drew apart, but only so far so they could share a sweet kiss.

“Not bad,” she answered, giggling as he nuzzled their noses together. “Morgana was asking again.”

Merlin rolled his eyes. “Arthur too.”

“What about Arthur?” came a voice and they turned, smiling, to see Lancelot standing at the edge of the clearing.

“Nothing,” Merlin answered as they went over to him. “Just the dear Pendragons worrying about the state of our relationships.”

“Teetering on the brink of collapse,” Lancelot replied, deadpan as he took him in his arms and kissed him. When they broke apart grinning, he turned to Gwen.

“My Lady,” he murmured, taking her hand and pressing his lips to it. His voice is low and earnest but his dark eyes smiled mischievously up at her. Gwen laughed and gathered him to her.

“Sir Knight,” she replied and pulled him in for a kiss. He wrapped an arm round her waist and spun her off her feet and she shrieked with laughter.

“Leon’s been at it too.” Lancelot said as they sat down and unpacked their lunches. They always pooled their food together and divided it equally - Lancelot, who still couldn’t believe how much he was allowed as a knight, would have it no other way.

“Leon?” Gwen laughed. “Since when did he care about romance?”

“He was worried I was upset at you two’s closeness. He’s a good friend,” Lancelot defended him, grinning.

Gwen smiled affectionately. “That he is. I’m so glad you’ve got him.”

“I guess we just have to hope Leon and Arthur never have a conversation about it,” Merlin said, biting his lip.

Gwen felt so sad looking at him. He lived balanced on so many knife edges.

“Not much chance of that happening,” Lancelot assured him, wrapping an arm round his waist and burying his head in his neck. “You’d be surprised at how much Leon keeps from Arthur because he thinks he’d have a meltdown if he knew.”

…………………

After they’d eaten, Merlin sat with his back against a tree. Gwen sat in his lap and Lancelot lay with his head resting in hers.

Gwen combed her fingers through his hair. “You’ve got so many knots in it,” she complained.

Lancelot grinned upside down at her. “I don’t exactly have much time to brush it. Maybe I should cut it. It goes all curly when it’s short.”

“I wanna see that!” Merlin said enthusiastically.

“But I won’t be able to braid your hair anymore!” Gwen protested.

“It’s ok Gwen,” Merlin patted her shoulder comfortingly but when she twisted her head round to look at him his eyes were twinkling impishly. “I’m sure we can find another dashing long haired commoner to get injured saving my life and wake up in my bed.”

”Great, so I’m being replaced?” Lancelot slid off Gwen’s lap to sit up and face them, arms folded, mock glaring.

Merlin grinned and shifted forward to sit on his lap, lifting a laughing Gwen with him and wrapping his arms round his neck and his long legs round his waist.

“Never,” he murmured against his mouth.

Sandwiched between them, Gwen trailed her lips over Lancelot’s neck as Merlin kissed him deeply.

Maybe they were a little overzealous in their attack of affection because Lance ended up overbalancing with an indignant noise and they toppled into a laughing heap on the soft grass.

“Ouch! Merlin, you’re squishing me!” Gwen protested, still chuckling.

“I thought you were worried I was too skinny,” Merlin teased, as he rolled off her.

“You’re both perfect,” Lancelot intervened, rolling his eyes, before Gwen could retort, putting one arm round Merlin and the other round Gwen as she flopped down beside him.

“Speaking of, do you want to come round for dinner tonight?” Merlin asked her (Lancelot still ate at Merlin’s most nights anyway). “Gaius is making my favourite.”

Gwen beamed. “I’d love to! I’ll tell Dad I’m eating with Morgana.”

She paused as she was reminded of something she’d wanted to discuss.

“I was thinking of telling him,” she said, and they both looked at her, attentive. “I know he knows something’s different and I know he worries.”

She sighed. “Ever since Elyan left-“ (Lancelot’s arm tightened comfortingly around her and Merlin reached over to stroke her cheek) – “he’s done nothing but worry about whether I’m really happy, and I just don’t want him to. Especially when it really is something happy. Plus, Gaius knows, it seems unfair to keep it from him. This way you can come round for dinner at ours too!”

They were smiling now.

”I love your dad,” Merlin said happily.

“Are you sure he’d be all right with us?” Lancelot asked gently.

She nodded. “It might take him a bit of getting used to, but he just wants me to be happy.”

Lancelot smiled softly at her, but she could see the sorrow behind his eyes and it stabbed at her heart. She knew how badly he wished he had family to tell about them too.

She wrapped her arms round him and snuggled close against him, and felt Merlin do the same on his other side, but she didn’t say anything. It was still often too painful for him to talk about. So she just pressed a kiss to his chest where his shirt rode down, and sighed.

“I just wish we didn’t have to keep us a secret at all.”

Lancelot looked down sadly at her. “You know how people would react if they found out you were courting two men. You could lose your job,”

“And if they knew you were consorting with commoners you would lose all your credibility as a knight,” she answered back, sighing again.

“And if I ever get found out it’ll be hard enough insisting my friends are innocent, let alone-“ Merlin gestured helplessly at them.

Gwen and Lancelot looked at each other again and groaned. They’d had this argument before.

“And you know that’s nonsense. We’re going to stick by you whatever,”

Merlin groaned too, and dropped his head onto Lancelot’s chest, making a small noise of affection into his shirt and reaching over to twine his fingers with Gwen’s.

“And you’re not going to get found out, especially now you’ve got us to help you, not just that horrible dragon,” she added, shuddering.

Merlin laughed at that. “He is an ass.”

Lancelot squeezed his other hand. “Things are changing already. Arthur’s heading in the right direction, right?”

Merlin smiled tenderly. “Yeah, but that’s mostly thanks to you.”

He propped his chin on Lancelot’s chest to look over at Gwen. “Didn’t you say your brother was good with a sword? Maybe he could come be a knight too. We need more commoners to piss off the nobles.”

Gwen smiled, indulging in the daydream, however unlikely it was. “He’d like that. And whatever boyfriend he’s doubtless picked up.”

“What makes you think his boyfriend would want to be a knight?” Lancelot asked curiously.

Gwen grinned. “Because Elyan has a type.” She indicated her arms and they fell about laughing again.

…………………

Life seemed so very beautiful to Gwen that day.

The sound of their laughter, the gold flashing in Merlin’s eyes as he made a cloud of butterflies appear for them, the wonder she felt reflected on Lancelot’s face. The way the sun illuminated them, making their skin glow and reflecting off their teeth when they smiled, the way it lit up their little bubble of happiness.

Others would wonder how they could ever be happy like this, how complicated it must be. But the truth was, what they had was so very simple, as easy as breathing.

The world might not be perfect yet, might never quite be, but what they had, in its own way, was.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos appreciated <3
> 
> Come hang out on [tumblr](https://donttouchtheneednoggle.tumblr.com/)!


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